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Surveillance Summaries: Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance — United States, 2013 (pdf, 172 pages). “Prevalence of Partner Violence in Same-Sex Romantic and Sexual Relationships in a National Sample of Adolescents.” Journal of Adolescent Health 35 (August 2004): 124-131.One NIJ-funded study examined the prevalence of dating violence among 5,647 teens (51.8 percent female, 74.6 percent Caucasian) from 10 middle schools and high schools (representing grades 7-12) throughout New York, New Jersey and Pennsylvania. "Partner Violence Among Adolescents in Opposite-Sex Romantic Relationships: Findings from the National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent Health." 91 (October 2001): 1679-1685. Findings indicated that within the past year: The study also specifically examined dating violence rates among teens who had dated within the past year (66 percent of total teens; n = 3,745). Surviving intimate partner violence, or relationship abuse, is hard.It’s especially difficult when you go to the same school as your abuser and have no choice but to eat in the same dining hall, study at the same library, attend the same classes, or participate in the same extracurricular activities.At the same time, abusers try to plant seeds of doubt in us to extend their control. There also may be people in your life who try to downplay your experience, which makes it more difficult for you to trust your gut feelings.
On one hand, there is the gut instinct to provide someone we care about with “the benefit of the doubt.” It’s when you start second-guessing this impulse, when you start doubting the benefits you’re providing, that the warning bells may start going off.Some of us found it helpful to keep a diary of our experiences so we could identify patterns in our partners’ behaviors and our reactions.Others of us relied on in-person or anonymous online support spaces for victims; this helped us gauge others’ reactions, when we felt we needed a second (or third or fourth) opinion.For some of us, leaving was a powerful way to regain control of our lives.For others, leaving can further complicate their situations.